Remember the un-brush-off guy?
Well, it’s not just dating where the English struggle with graceful refusals. They plain hate saying no.*
Their version: “I’d love to come to brunch, but I have a hen-do the evening before, and I’m staying overnight at the bride’s in Notting Hill, so I don’t know if I’ll be able to get home, change, and make it back to yours in time.”
My response: “Oh, it’s very casual, don’t worry about being late.”
Then: dawning realization that in England, I have the social skills of Rainman. The would-be guest wasn’t worried about tardiness. She was doing the English equivalent of “Oh, I’d love to, but I already have plans!”
I was lamenting about all this to my friend Aimee. She said, “You mean, in America, that’s all you have to say?” Yes. “How lovely. I spend so much time trying to think of excuses that sound good enough.”
Surprisingly, there is one circumstance where the English are actually okay with saying no: “Afraid I can’t make Saturday. There’s a work-do Friday, and I’ll have quite the fuzzy head.”
Yup. In England, an anticipated hangover is a legitmate excuse for a 30-year-old.
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* Even on Facebook, an English party invitation will incur 12 Yesses, 47 Maybes, and not one No.
To an American, that’s just crazytown. How do you know how much beer to chill and sour cream’n’onion dip to make if your friends won’t give you an honest rsvp?